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December 16, 2005
Huzzah's all round
I went to church last night for a carol service. Half way through the minister's prayer, I broke down in tears. For some unknown reason it seemed to be the best thing that's happened to me these past few weeks. I regained some form of spirituality. Not necessarily with "God" per se, but I regained my faith in life and connected with something that made me feel whole again. As I walked out the church it felt like a little bit of the weight was lifted from my shoulders. I do not commit to the name "God" as I am, as we all know, of the science faculty of life, and like to see results and be objective. I do find it hard to draw up enough faith in something that may not be there. I believe, possibly in a higher being, although I still do debate with my oh-so-inquisitive-mind as to why we are here, so I sway back and forth to "Yes, we were all created by God" to "Darwin was right, we were once moknies"
My mom's also having a tough time at the moment, so I stayed at hers to provide company last night. I've been obsesively checking the univeristy's homepage the past week for my exam results as they advised they would be posted this week My God......dial-up and result waiting do not go well together. It was the longest 3 minutes of my life waiting for the page to load. I covered my eyes like I was watching a horror film. I saw my exam marks and just burst into tears.....again. Like earlier that evening they were tears of relief. Not only did I pass, not only did I get my B (77% ^ ^) I worked so hard for, but I bloody well did better in my exam than in my assignments which were all open book. I couldn't believe my peepers. I've been checking every 10 minutes just to make sure. Admittedly, it's not an A, but I didn't expect to get an A. All through my school career I've been a B student, why should I break the habit now? I feel B's are under-rated anyway.
Anyways, bottle of wine open with my name on.....celebrations all round.
Posted by kat at December 16, 2005 8:09 PM
