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September 29, 2006
i made it!
So I made it through the first proper week of University...go me! I'm finding it a fun challenge, completed with incoherent information, and loony lecturers. I'm so glad I did the courses with the OU, as I can actually understand what these plonkers are on about, and I really do sympathise with the nubs. So the physics based course is proving a challenge, but I'm working that, and am very proud of my progress. The chemistry bit, well, it's chemistry. This is where I'm glad I have my background knowledge.
The Biology is on a whole different level. The lecturer is a whackjob, who can't remember what the C in G A T C of DNA stands for, is absolutely enthralled by Archaea, which he pronounces differently everytime, as he does often with most other words.
I learnt a valuable lesson in a lecture today..don't doze off. The lecturer is bound to...oh, I don't know, smash a teacup as a demo just as you're getting to that disorientated stage. Never again will I let my attention wonder.
Gettin excited for December when I'll get to spend some quality time with the peeps and family back home. Hoorah. I just wish it could have been a longer a stay, but alas, school will get in the way...oh well!
Posted by kat at 3:38 PM | Comments (0)
September 27, 2006
New Years Resolution
So, I have the habit of making New Year's Res' a bit on the late side, 9, almost 10 months too late, but needless to say, I have set myself a goal. No more moaning. I whine a bit too much, and it something that I would like to try change. Fair enough, my moans can sometimes be funny, and I shall keep on moaning about things like the government and such (I don't really go on about them enough). But moaning about how rubbish I feel is not necessary. Everyone else is probably feeling just as crap, and I never really take that into account. People are far worse off than I am. In fact, I have it pretty good....it could be better, but I'm okay! On the updating my blog side, I will try and keep everyone up-to-date with my day-to-day uni antics, which I suspect will get all the more exciting now that I have my own lab coat, which is worth every pence of the whole £8 it costs (gotto love school subsidies), and my oh-so-cool better-than-my-last-pair-won't-fit-over-my-seeing-glasses goggles^^ Oh, and I found some other people who are proud to be geeks and have joined the J.D. Appreciation society (J.D's the lecturer who reads out poetry and points out in midsentence of something else that there is a fly on the projecter).
I have also set myself another goal. Seeing as the whole "making friends" business is not going too well, I shall endevour to go through the whole semester without friends. Hell, I make it a fun task. Any tips on how to avoid making friends will be most welcomed.
I really am joking about that, I would like to meet some like minded people, although I suspect in my case it may take a bit longer than usual, so thank you to all who are supporting me during this time when I need shoulders to cry on, or and ear to listen as I have no one here who can fulfil that role. I be sure to mention you when I do my acceptence speach for my Nobel Prize^^ Now that isn't a joke, I've always put myself down about things, in order do well, as I think that if you think yourself good at something, you don't strive as much to be better. I do however, believe that dreams are attainable, as long as you're willing to put the work in. From the moment I signed my name on the matriculation form, that was the moment my career in Science began. I feel that I have no boundries as to how much success I can have, as long as I keep focussed and work hard. There's over-confidence, and there's self-belief, and I am slowly beginning to understand the two. I have self-belief, but know that I will make mistakes, and as long as I learn from them, I will improve.
On a side note, something came over me to check out here . It made me well up a bit at 7:30. I always wanted a sister, and as girly as my brother is, he never really fulfilled that role. I'm so happy for our new addition to the family (well new addition +1 with the new member moving into the house a few weeks back), and although I don't always show it, as I am dreadful at telling people how much they mean to me, I really enjoyed having someone as cool as Naku around to give me support and to have giggles with (my favourite moment had to be when Drew was trying to set up Sky). I insist that I am an independent person, and sometimes push away the help that is given to me, to prove that I can be successful on my own. Sometimes I would say no to things that were offered to me, because I believed that it made me look like a stronger person, when in fact, it could have been construed as me refusing something that has willingly been given with love and care. I would like to say thank you for all the effort that you did put in to trying to get to know me better, and I'm sorry if I seemed stuck up sometimes, that's just me trying to be strong. I really wish I had opened up to you more when I was there, but everything seems to be clearer in hindsight. That's how we learn.
The mother said something to me the other day. She's full of wisdom, and doesn't really know it. She said we never stop learning in life, everything is a stepping stone closer to Nirvana, but we never really stop learning from things and experiences until we die. Sucks a bit, that we'll never have a time in our lives where we can sit back, and think "This is nice, no more struggling, or making mistakes". I suppose everyone is in the same position though, so we can all struggle together.
My brain hurts now from thinking, plus I have lab equipment to try on and model. Have a happy Wednesday =)
Posted by kat at 12:06 PM | Comments (0)
September 24, 2006
Timetables
I've been mulling over some work figuring out my timetables and such, and I am ever so excited for the microbial studies we will be doing soon. I can't wait to learn my phyletic trees^^ I haven't had that many funny stories to tell lately. I am hoping that I will have some fab anecdotes or interesting pieces of Science to convey to the world. I feel a bit bland at the moment not having anything fun in my life at the moment. Lectures have all been introductory, and we haven't started the lab work....Oh yes...I will be blowing up things. No self respecting Scientist wouldn't take risks in order to discover something amazing, right?
So this year, potatoes are off the menu...and it's apples we'll be probing. Oh the fun...I may even figure out how to make my own cider, not that I like it much, but students love cheap alcohol ~ I could actually make some friends! Ah, I did fail to omit one funny thing. This was when the, and I shall use this phrase as I cannot think of anything else to describe him, eccentric dude who was to give us our first lecture on the Origin and Diversity of Life, started and ended our lecture with some really deep poetry, with bloody long words, and no sense to them either. What's more, is that they didn't even relate to the subject matter (It was about Pontus Pilot washing his hands or something). I am, however, looking forward to more ODL lectures which will comprise of 15 minutes of poetry and reinactments that will not be examined on!
Oh well, things to read up on. Happy Sunday.
Posted by kat at 2:30 PM | Comments (0)
September 22, 2006
uni stuffs
My first week of lectures is almost over, and I have only almost fallen asleep in one....go me! It's been a rough week. I'm still a bit of a loner, and although I have tried to make friends, I don't really fit in anywhere. I'm going to a few society meets next week to see if I can find some nice people to hand out with. I would prefer it if they weren't in the same courses as me, as I do like to distance myself from people when I'm studying and concentrating. I've been doing alot of thinking about where I want to go with my degree, and I may have a chat with my Director of Studies later on in the year. I'm needing a bit more of a challenge.
Oh yeah, I worked out I walk at least 3 miles a day, what fun. 6 miles if I have a day like today where there is only one lecture in the morning, and a few later on in the day. Oh the joys of being a student. I just wish I'd find my niche already.....
Posted by kat at 10:16 AM | Comments (0)
September 20, 2006
stuff
Some areas in my life aren't going so well. I know exactly what the problem is, but I just don't really want to talk much about it. I don't think there is anyone who would a) understand, b) be able to help in anyway or c) be the right person for me to feel comfortable talking to. I hate not being in control of things in my life. I don't want to control anybody elses, it's just things that I could do to make my life go better.
Suppose all the excitement of starting courses has lead to a bit of a down patch for me, which has highlighted a few things I am not happy about, which I cannot change as they involve other people. I hope that things just sort themselves out.
Sorry for being cryptic, but I honestly don't want to talk about it, however I do want those closest to me to understand if I am being a bit off with them. It's got nothing to do with any of my friends or family, just, other people that have affected my life.
Posted by kat at 12:18 PM | Comments (0)
September 19, 2006
First day at school
Well, what a fabulous way to begin a semister. Half an hour standing in the cold because someone thought it would be funny to set off the fire alarms. Ha, bloody ha. It's raining out now. I suppose that is one consolation ~ it wasn't raining when we were huddled out in the cold like sheep. Well, I have a lecture later on, which hopefully will be less/more eventful than this morning's one.
My student achievement for the week > I found noodles for 8p a pack....yes folks, 8p. If I wasnt so paranoid about scurvy, I could live off 24p a day, which would leave me oodles of dosh to buy clothes and shoes. I shall not be doing that though. Fresh fruit and veg for me courtesy of Tesco.com...I am so lazy. They'll deliver my monthly shop to my door for £3.99 ~ bargain!
Anyway, timetables to draw up, rooms to clean. The life of a student is never dull.
Posted by kat at 11:41 AM | Comments (1)
September 15, 2006
learning to fly
This week has been momentous for me. Not only have I enrolled on an exciting adventure, but I have learnt alot about myself. It's not so much new things that I have learnt, just reaffirmation. I've learnt that I need people around me at all times to function, although I do struggle when people get too close. I also flit about far to much...it's part of my nature...unfortunately the one thing i can't seem to tame. I'm not in the class of ADHD, but I need things to constantly change. I can never see myself settled. I've been trying, but either the time isn't right, or I'll never be. My life moves too quickly for most to keep up. They want things a certain way, and I keep on changing. I'm inconsistent I suppose, and although faithful to loyal to mist, probably unreliable too.
I am also more social than I give myself credit for. I just started to come out of my shell before I left work, and although I'm not one to go out and get trashed every night, I like the odd tipple with the girls now and then, but mostly I like to be in the company of people. Saying that, I enjoy my alone time too, I think I need a 70/30 ratio of social to me time. I like to think an awful lot. My thoughts are deep, but my emotions aren't. That's not to say my emotions aren't prominent. I like to cry....alot, and I wear my heart on my sleeve, but I feel that they are not as deep as most people's. In the moment they seem to be, but they quickly wear off. I always tease my brother of being a "girl pants", because he tends to dwell on things alot longer. I have my cry and then everything's ok again.
I also suffer from the dangling carrot syndrome. I think I made that up, but it makes sense to me. As long as I don't have it, I'll want it. I'm constantly following that dangling carrot of getting my degree, but I am a bit worried as to what will happen when I do get it. What will be my next goal, my next carrot? I know it's four years off, but I like to stay ahead.
Hmmm, let's try think up some positive points then, shall we? There are none that I can think of at the moment, as it is only these things that have been brought to light lately. I'm a free spirit in some ways, in others I just want stability. I wish I would decide which sometimes.
Posted by kat at 5:13 PM | Comments (0)
September 11, 2006
scottish shenanigans
So...I have landed on the sunny shores of Scotland, and there is much of nothing to tell. Went exploring a bit yesterday, but not as much as I would have liked to. I am going to wonder around more today. I just hope my little legs are up to it! My room is lovely and spacious, and my flatmates seem nice too. I am looking forward to meeting new friends as well, though. My only complaint it that my room slants downhill a bit.....and as my chair is on wheels, I keep on rolling backwards!
More of an update will follow when I have some fun things to tell. All I have done so far is unpack, clean and bake!
Posted by kat at 7:49 AM | Comments (0)
September 8, 2006
so unnoticed
I thought I had passed under the radar unnoticed, just drifting through life. Apparently it seems I have touched and inspired many people. So many people were so sad to see me go today. I had so many cards and presents, and someone even commented that in all their 25 years at the bank, I must have affected the most amount of people, and that I had the most cards/gifts that she had seen. In a way I feel guilty that so many people looked up to me, admired me, and relied upon me. I feel cruel for letting them become dependent on me, and even worse for letting people believe that I was something that I think I am most certainly not. I was a friend to those who didn't have many, and my departure is a big loss to them. I took time out to be nice to eveyone, and create a special bond with most, as I believed a good working relationship with my colleagues would improve the atmosphere and make them more approachable when I needed help. I always took work off others with no questions asked. I made life difficult for myself, so others would have it easier.....and I thought that no one noticed...but they did, and they showed it today. Today must have been one of the hardest days of my life. I'm losing so much, yet I have to look ahead to what I shall gain. There will always be a job waiting for me their, with people willing to work with me. It feels like I'm losing part of my family. Since the beginning of the year, I was spending up to 10 hours a day at work...a big part of my waking hours, and so naturally firendships build with the people you are surrounded with all the time. I'm going to miss everyone so dearly. I feel like writing everyone emails to thank them for their kindness toward me...I honestly did not think I deserved it.
Posted by kat at 9:01 PM | Comments (1)
September 2, 2006
omgomgomgomg
In one week I shall be on the boat >< I am very much petrified. I still have things unresolved, which I hope to to all in order by Friday afternoon, like my letter from the government that still hasn't come. My god, I'm going to arrive at the university doors all like "Hi!", and they're going to go "Erm....no!". That is my biggest fear...arriving there, and they are like, well...we don't really want you here. They certainly don't make this process easy. I like lots of paperwork, it's reassuring. With this I get a letter saying "Sure, we'll pay for your things", and then another letter telling the university "We're going to pay her things" of which I'm supposed to get a copy WHICH STILL HASN'T ARRIVED!
Aaaargh! I'm going to explode with nerves. Pretty much everything is packed up, apart from my machine, my bedding, and some work clothes for next week. Well last night I had a lovely surprise. The coolest pair I know call me into their room like a naughty schoolgirl, and present me with....well...presents^^ Leaving presents included:
1) The best recipe booklet a girl could have including the "Potato Filling O' Doom"
2) Kimono pegs for bundling up homework, and best of all.....
3) A 4 GB iPod nano, which I am yet to figure out how to work. I downloaded pretty much every song I own (approx 850) last night, and it still isn't filled \o/.
I really am spoilt sometimes. I was expecting leaving presents of like hangover pills or something, but Les really did go above and beyond with that. At least everytime I listen to my music on the long walk to the campus, I can think of all my happy adventures here.
Right, more nervous energy to expend....I'm going to dust!
Posted by kat at 10:11 AM | Comments (0)