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September 27, 2006
New Years Resolution
So, I have the habit of making New Year's Res' a bit on the late side, 9, almost 10 months too late, but needless to say, I have set myself a goal. No more moaning. I whine a bit too much, and it something that I would like to try change. Fair enough, my moans can sometimes be funny, and I shall keep on moaning about things like the government and such (I don't really go on about them enough). But moaning about how rubbish I feel is not necessary. Everyone else is probably feeling just as crap, and I never really take that into account. People are far worse off than I am. In fact, I have it pretty good....it could be better, but I'm okay! On the updating my blog side, I will try and keep everyone up-to-date with my day-to-day uni antics, which I suspect will get all the more exciting now that I have my own lab coat, which is worth every pence of the whole £8 it costs (gotto love school subsidies), and my oh-so-cool better-than-my-last-pair-won't-fit-over-my-seeing-glasses goggles^^ Oh, and I found some other people who are proud to be geeks and have joined the J.D. Appreciation society (J.D's the lecturer who reads out poetry and points out in midsentence of something else that there is a fly on the projecter).
I have also set myself another goal. Seeing as the whole "making friends" business is not going too well, I shall endevour to go through the whole semester without friends. Hell, I make it a fun task. Any tips on how to avoid making friends will be most welcomed.
I really am joking about that, I would like to meet some like minded people, although I suspect in my case it may take a bit longer than usual, so thank you to all who are supporting me during this time when I need shoulders to cry on, or and ear to listen as I have no one here who can fulfil that role. I be sure to mention you when I do my acceptence speach for my Nobel Prize^^ Now that isn't a joke, I've always put myself down about things, in order do well, as I think that if you think yourself good at something, you don't strive as much to be better. I do however, believe that dreams are attainable, as long as you're willing to put the work in. From the moment I signed my name on the matriculation form, that was the moment my career in Science began. I feel that I have no boundries as to how much success I can have, as long as I keep focussed and work hard. There's over-confidence, and there's self-belief, and I am slowly beginning to understand the two. I have self-belief, but know that I will make mistakes, and as long as I learn from them, I will improve.
On a side note, something came over me to check out here . It made me well up a bit at 7:30. I always wanted a sister, and as girly as my brother is, he never really fulfilled that role. I'm so happy for our new addition to the family (well new addition +1 with the new member moving into the house a few weeks back), and although I don't always show it, as I am dreadful at telling people how much they mean to me, I really enjoyed having someone as cool as Naku around to give me support and to have giggles with (my favourite moment had to be when Drew was trying to set up Sky). I insist that I am an independent person, and sometimes push away the help that is given to me, to prove that I can be successful on my own. Sometimes I would say no to things that were offered to me, because I believed that it made me look like a stronger person, when in fact, it could have been construed as me refusing something that has willingly been given with love and care. I would like to say thank you for all the effort that you did put in to trying to get to know me better, and I'm sorry if I seemed stuck up sometimes, that's just me trying to be strong. I really wish I had opened up to you more when I was there, but everything seems to be clearer in hindsight. That's how we learn.
The mother said something to me the other day. She's full of wisdom, and doesn't really know it. She said we never stop learning in life, everything is a stepping stone closer to Nirvana, but we never really stop learning from things and experiences until we die. Sucks a bit, that we'll never have a time in our lives where we can sit back, and think "This is nice, no more struggling, or making mistakes". I suppose everyone is in the same position though, so we can all struggle together.
My brain hurts now from thinking, plus I have lab equipment to try on and model. Have a happy Wednesday =)
Posted by kat at September 27, 2006 12:06 PM
