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August 18, 2007

Enid Blyton

I'm a strong believer of fate and that everything happens for a reason. I didn't get that other job because I've had to learn valuable things from this job, like how to make a strong brew.

I find it rather difficult dealing with "normal" people who don't know me very well. When people ask me "what did you get up to this weekend?" , I feel awkward and go all shy. I don't know how to answer the question. One version would be "Well, I had wild, naked parties on a beach, drank lots and ate loads of pies and sushi and kebabs". This would of course entail me levelling on FFXI. Another response could be along the lines of "Had a good weekend with a bunch of mates"...whom I have never met in real life, but know are better people than most of the ones I come across.

I digress though, fate is a funny thing. It's what's kept me going. if something bad happens, and always think of what my mom says, "it happened because there is something better to come". It's the only piece of solid advice I've taken from her.

The rest of what I have taken as life skills is from that silly little lady, Enid. The whole independence thing for instance. Looks at the fantastic five and the secret seven. Hell, even the faraway tree doo-dah. All those kids didn't have parent figures looking after them. They'd fend for themselves. I had this romantic vision (and still do) of what real independence is like. Not having to rely on anyone, being able to support myself, yet what Enid fails to show, is that you need emotional support as well. I failed to recognise this, and saw it as a sign of weakness having to rely on somebody, and so was very unhappy for some time, not wanting to trouble anyone with my problems. I'm now blessed with someone who has shown me differently. That it's ok to need someone every now and then.

Another example of my Enid Blyton brainwashing is my want to go to a boarding school. I dreamt of midnight feasts, and adventure. Little did I know that it would mean strict meal times and rubbish curfews.

I've also come to the conclusion that I am nothing without worry. I worry for people I hardly know, it keeps me up and night, and makes me cry when I see people hurt. I dream about them, and wake up feeling awful. Slowly something else worthy of my worry energy will replace it, but I'm constantly worrying about things.

On a lighter note this made me giggle a bit today. So did the "What did you do this weekend, same as last, stay in your jim jams?", "Yeah", " You're boring", "Thanks" conversation I had earlier with a colleague.

Happy week. One more week and one more month =D

Posted by kat at August 18, 2007 2:54 PM

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Posted by: The mothership at August 22, 2007 4:20 AM

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